A family of former child heroes, now grown apart, must reunite to continue to protect the world.

Umbrella Academy PosterThe Umbrella Academy is an adaptation based on a let’s-make-the-X-Men-a-dysfunctional-family. comic book series. Then Netflix (pox be upon them) latched on and made them the angsty, bitter, millennial X-Men.

Seven adopted kids. Six kids have superpowers, and one kid, Vanya, does not. (I bet Vanya is the most powerful, but her powers are hidden.)

Vanya is picked on by everyone her whole life, so she’s very bitter. (I bet Vanya is the Dark Phoenix.)

Vanya finally meets a nice guy. He’s so accommodating and normal. He’s perfect. (I bet he’s evil and is using Vanya for her hidden powers.)

All the while there is a countdown to the apocalypse. (I bet Vanya is involved.)

I’m not trying to crap on the whole thing. It was entertaining, well-acted, had high production value, and there were a few twists I didn’t see coming. However, I did guess all the major plot points correctly. (and if *I* guessed them, they were too obvious.)

I didn’t guess the ending 100%, but I was correct that it was going to be a cop-out. But I knew there was going to be a season two so…that was a big hint.

Watch: Season 1, yes. Season 2, eh maybe.

Did I mention there is time travel? I hate time travel.